29 days to go
I am so stressed out at the moment... I have to prepare some records for inspection. It isn't really stressful in itself, but I have now I think developed some kind of anxiety disorder. I can't help it, everything makes me anxious. Deciding what to have for dinner makes me anxious, deciding when to go to the gym, what to wear, what to do with figures in the thesis... So now, thinking of preparing records AND writing AND being unemployed/unemployable is making me feel so stressed I think I could throw up. I can't wait till the fucking DPhil is done. Stress is even getting in the way of boyfriend-related activities.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Hey there stranger
Writing
31 days to go!
Hi there, it's been a while. How are you? How am I? Yeah, not bad... done fuck all writing and have about a month before my deadline... ok, it's a fake deadline, the ultimate one being in mid Jan, but it's still scaring me.
So why haven't I written? Because... I don't know. I'm lazy? I just can't write well? Not motivated anymore? Panicking about having no income? Having to work in shitty lab with Mr. ArSeHoLe to make enough money to pay rent is making me depressed? Yes, they could all have something to do with it. Mr. ArSeHoLe and generally being unemployed and in my 5th year here are actually motivating me enough I think. I am getting there, slowly but surely. I'm staying in Poxford over Christmas to write.
Hot neighbour
No sightings for weeks now... The Dr. and I are planning on having him over next month, though I think we will probably have to invite the whole house. I'm not really sure how many people live next door, but it shouldn't be a problem. I'm getting nervous just thinking about it.
Jobs
I've got nowhere on the job front either. I have an interview coming up in a 3 weeks but that's like the only one.
Random
C and I nearly bought a 40 piece crockery set from We-sell-junk channel. White with silver rims, it looked pretty boring but ok for general use at home, you know, not our finest crockery but ok for us at home, and the price dropped to below £30... if it wasn't for the fact that none of it could go in the microwave, it was a done deal.
31 days to go!
Hi there, it's been a while. How are you? How am I? Yeah, not bad... done fuck all writing and have about a month before my deadline... ok, it's a fake deadline, the ultimate one being in mid Jan, but it's still scaring me.
So why haven't I written? Because... I don't know. I'm lazy? I just can't write well? Not motivated anymore? Panicking about having no income? Having to work in shitty lab with Mr. ArSeHoLe to make enough money to pay rent is making me depressed? Yes, they could all have something to do with it. Mr. ArSeHoLe and generally being unemployed and in my 5th year here are actually motivating me enough I think. I am getting there, slowly but surely. I'm staying in Poxford over Christmas to write.
Hot neighbour
No sightings for weeks now... The Dr. and I are planning on having him over next month, though I think we will probably have to invite the whole house. I'm not really sure how many people live next door, but it shouldn't be a problem. I'm getting nervous just thinking about it.
Jobs
I've got nowhere on the job front either. I have an interview coming up in a 3 weeks but that's like the only one.
Random
C and I nearly bought a 40 piece crockery set from We-sell-junk channel. White with silver rims, it looked pretty boring but ok for general use at home, you know, not our finest crockery but ok for us at home, and the price dropped to below £30... if it wasn't for the fact that none of it could go in the microwave, it was a done deal.
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